barriers broken

I have learned that grief looks and feels different to each individual.I have tried to process my grief by crying alot, writing and sharing with family and friends. My son has felt like he had to process his grief alone. Stephen was always who Sean turned to when he felt lonely and sad and now he just feels lost. He shared this with me today for the first time.We talked a long time. Some of what Sean shared was hard to hear, some of it was heartbreaking but I am so glad we finally were able to talk and get things out in the open. I found that we both have moments when we simply can't believe it and moments when we feel guilty for the things we said or didn't say.I thought that I was there for Sean but it turns out that that is not what he felt. He has felt alone this entire time. In giving him his space to grieve in his own way I didn't see that what he was doing was isolating and that he is in a lot of pain. He told me that all he has wanted was for me to show that I cared about what he was going through not just if he looked for a job that day. He told me today that he has felt like I am all he has left and that I am so wrapped up in my own pain and sorrow that I could not be there for him. I am guilty for being stuck up in my own head that I forgot that I am not the only one who lost Stephen. He was my son yes but he was Sean's brother and best friend. I am so grateful that we were finally able to talk to each other not just about Stephen but about where we both were and where we both want to be. We have decided to spend at least a couple of hours a week together just keep up the communication. This is our time to start the healing process together and I so blessed to get this chance.